TRANSFORMATION, REBOOT AND HAPPIENSS

March 6th, 2020

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I was born on March 6th under a water sign of Pisces. I celebrate the day of my 36th birthday skydiving in the open Norwegian spaces, filling them up with the stories of origin. In my body, I reconstruct the first map according to which we, the humans, move and navigate. This map is maternal and wet. It is made of amniotic waters that are never neutral. The first currents we experience are made of mixtures affecting the rest of our lives: nature, culture, biology, class, race etc. Beyond the composition one can educate her_himself, there was my mother's love transferred to me directly through her amniotic waters.

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Amniotic Waters of the Universe I, Elena Kozhenikova

Elena Kozhevnikova, Amniotic Waters of the Universe I

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My mom and dad gave me strong bones and teeth, which the planetary system of March 6, 1984 has been surrounding since that time by quite deep and penetrating body sensitivity. It is enough to search for the space needed for breathing and living, but not enough to defend against the patriarchal abyss or dark, homophobic culture based on a limited imagination, so different from the maternal conditions from which I arose. And with the insufficient imagination, it is easy to have empathy and equality deficiencies.

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Fish, tarot card

Growing and maturing in the unsustainable world combined my longing to live fully with a sense of inadequacy experienced at many levels of my professional career. The energy between the individual life horoscope and the global state of the world gradually took the shape of a rough wave. Life processes have started to be laid out in the following decades mostly filled with confronting real threats, angular inequalities, and stripping the immunity system by sediments of pollutions of our environment. However, the stiffening of living conditions and disturbance of the planetary hydrodynamic balance were not permanent and general. In my life, I also experience shared love, joy and happiness.

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On my birthday, I connect with all of the critters, who sense the removal of the solid ground under their feet not only as severe, but also challenging. I am aware of being very lucky to have this kind of opportunity, so I am sucking it dry to the point that stimulates the memory of living in the original coziness. Deprivation strengthens the impulse to remain in friendship with the world during the following cycles of becoming. For some time now, for me they became motivated by care for the liquid, wet, penetrating aquatic environment, speeding up extinction of the harmful structures of the old system we, humans, created.

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And so bipedaism begins to run dry. As a result of depleting water resources, standing on two legs is no longer enough circumstance to deal with the dramatically changing living conditions of our drying planet. Anticipating evolutionary processes for the next hundreds and thousands of years, a gradual transformation of the human body occurs to be more than a mambo jumbo forecast. More and more regions of the world are already providing us with the experiences of humans with their heads tilted between their hands in search of water.

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starfish tarot card

I keep in mind that the logic of destruction processes is intertwined with the logic of regeneration and healing. Under my Zodiac sign, I dream of the world not deprived of the waters, and along with that mission I also dream of the evolution of our bodies striving to conjoin our hands in a shape of the vessel - in this way, there will be no room for currently dominant wasteful porosity. In this vision, human feet will be in turn clamped on the back resembling a fin - a natural extension of life impulse. The embryonic position, today formatting human bodies in war refugee camps, will become a common germ of new communication during the migration caused by the climate crisis. Such a response of the human body to poverty, misfortune, and exhaustion of previous ways of inhabiting the Earth brings hope for a return to the state of unicellular beginning of the world: not in the position of a detail, facade, separation or fear, but as a part of a larger whole, vulnerable to fresh starts, fastening, balance and connecting with others. In my dream, there is a vast blue ocean enough for everybody.

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As long as we manage to protect the impulse of life from destruction and allow ourselves to become a part of the major transformation, there is something unique in every catastrophe. By telling out this truth about the dramas of our past, we save our larger family from further imbalance and lack of happiness. And happiness is still work worth the work, dear Pisces circulating with other Zodiac signs.

Bibliography

Neimanis, Astrida, The Bodies of the Water: Posthuman Feminist Fenomenology, Bloomsbury Academic London, 2017.